For inexplicable reasons, I found myself sauntering over to Languages whilst in Kinokuniya this afternoon and picking up a Nepali-English language book before strolling over to the to Travel section and flipped through the Lonely Planet guide book on trekking in the Himalayas.

Did I mention I've been sleeping so much more nowadays? Ever since returning, I've been sleeping for a good 9 to 10 hours straight, with naps during the day. My mum says my body is still recovering from trekking 5000m above sea level and is still tired.

She's wrong. Its not my body that's tired. Its my heart and soul that's tired from missing Nepal so much right now. I've always scoffed when people mention how much it hurts to miss something so bad. I now take it back.

I think Nepal may have changed my outlook and perspective in life. I got a B in Statistics when I saw my results online. Typically when I see a B, I begin to throw fits and remain moody and despondent to the point of being suicidal. But when I looked at that incriminating alphabet, I accepted it with stride, for some inexplicable reason. I didn't understand why I wasn't throwing a fuss or crying to myself on the bed. Maybe I did whine a little to M, but I didn't feel as overworked as I always did before.

I even surprised myself when I told my mum, who was lamenting over how she needed to start kicking my brother into gear for exams in his final year, that there are more things in life thangrades reflected on some piece of paper.

This is me?!

I think I'm possessed.

This might just be a temporary phase, and after I'm relieved of the Nepal high/nostalgia, I shall revert back to my old ways.

I'm tired already.

I still have stuff I need to get out my system, but I'm not giving two hoots about it right now. I need sleep.

Goodnight, my paradoxical world that I'm living in right now. You amuse me, bemuse me and confuse me all at once.