I don't understand why people manage to somehow weave their relationship and love lives into their blog posts and it becomes so....momentous to them.

I'm beginning to see why I chose to leave Blogger. Plus, this is why I cannot become a counselor. People who don't verbalize their feelings tend to annoy me after a while. Like dude. Just. Freaking. Say. It. It doesn't have to be in all snazzy poetic language. Just. Say. It.

Feeling a little confused lately. Just realized the extent to which how ambivalent I can get about trade-offs in my life.

I haven't been dancing for almost 2 weeks and I feel...bad. I mean. I want to dance. And get better. But priorities are priorities. And my trading dance for studies right now and its just weird. I love dancing and I really want to train for ANY performance that there might be but its just.

AAARGH.

I wish I had started dancing earlier in life.
I want to resume piano again. After OSIP ends.

It amazes me how some people can fill their blog posts with so much passion and words mixed with snazzy vocabulary. Its like their language they use for theie blog posts are meant for poems. Not blogs. But whatever.

I don't even know why I cam here to blog. I can't bring myself to start studying for A.B. Maybe its because I'm consciously aware of the fact that I've started studying SO late beforehand it panics me. BUT NO. I refuse to let my GPA slide because I want to go to Australia for OSIP.

So there.

Screw my social life, or lack of.

Okay so before you say anything, let me just say I'm going to revive my blog and start blogging again for a bit, because Big T (Thomas Sim) says we all need a healthy outlet to channel our frustrations and feelings, otherwise we may turn to drugs and whatnot (:

I cannot believe school term is ending in a less than 2 weeks. And hopefully Azeemha, Shoe, Hong Cherh & I get selected to go to Australia for our intership as a Research Assistant at Flinders University. Now I have to figure out how I'm going to survive there with the possibility of not having almods at my disposal, and not exercising everyday because I need to get in shape. Shoe suggested growing an almond tree which I admit, sounds like an awesome idea.

Just hope I get selected to go to Australia first! Eunice mentioned that we get selected based on grades and sense of responsibility & all. And I just hope I can score for A.B and Child Psyche tests which are in less than 2 weeks, to which I have NOT yet studied for.

I skipped dance trg today to get A.B powerpoint slides done. And start studying for A.B. I feel. Bad. Because I've not been dancing properly for a while. Though if I get selected to go to Aus, I won't be dancing for about 3 months or something along those lines.

I watched Inception with Shoe on Wednesday and it was simply mind-banging. Leonardo is awesome. I love his movies: Titanic, Blood Diamond & Body of Lies.

Just went to the Student Portal and found out I got 24 points for NAPFA test, which translates into a Silver award. Which sucks, because I was counting on a Gold, but I did horrid for the Shuttle Run & Standing Broad Jump, which sucks even more because these 2 were my best stations in secondary school. I could do 9 seconds and 180cm back in the old days. BAM =/

More later.

Goodbye blogger. I'm parting ways with you after 321 posts to be precise and placing my roots in Tumblr - thepurpleonion.tumblr.com.

Clearly I've been neglecting my blogger account, given the sporadic posts that I've put.

It's back to school tomorrow and the holidays were pretty. Well sane. Shopping and homework and dancing. Plus the most awesome 19th birthday celebration by awesome friends.

Went out to Vivocity today to look for jackets and dresses but didn't manage to procure them, despite the GSS sale thing. Mostly I spotted blazers which aren't my thing because they're pretty common and I want STATEMENT jackets. Might probably go to Far East to look for them next Friday after the dready HF test on Thursday.

Went to Topshop looking for Jia Li, but I forgot she's off duty from Thursdays to Sundays but I was surprised to see my NEIGHBOUR working there! She was at the door greeting customers so she went "Are you my neighbour?" because she was looking at me very expectantly and I was wondering if she knew me. Turns out I couldn't really recognize her in her nerdy glasses. Topshop stuff are pretty expensive, considering its the GSS. But I bought a girly mint green dress.

Am going to ask my mum if I can get jeans from Mango before the GSS ends. They're like less than $50 now as compared to their price of almost $200! I want new jeans. Either in grey or a stone-washed color. Humph.

Okay time to study for DREADYY HF test. 8 chapters in all! I've only studied 4! Wanted to study 1 chapter in the morning before I went shopping but failed. Did only half. Grrrrr. I submitted to temptation of sleep.

Life Lessons

Living with my family members under the same roof for over 18 years has made me realize certain things in my life:

1. I am very, very possessive of my belongings.

2. I hate sharing my belongings with my siblings and mother

3. I hate the noise of the mother shouting because it annoys the shit out of me.

4. My father is a stranger to me.

5. My mother is almost a stranger to me too.

6. So are my siblings.

7. My brother is a parasite.

8. I get very upset when the mother comes into my room and starts rummaging through everything because of (1)

9. I dread the father talking sometimes.

10. Its actually possible for the father to not say a single word to his child the entire day, hence leading to (4).

11. Its all right for the mother to do something wrong, like break a fucking cup, but when any of us do it, we're sent straight to hell.

12. I love my dog so very much because he showers you with love every single minute and you can actually see and feel it.

13. I wish I had different parents. Like a set of parents who were Southern (American) and I'll feel loved everyday, with a sense of belonging. And sing and learn the guitar too.

14. I want my own place to live in and get away from this dysfunctional family.